These list of  relationship red flags are based on some of my experiences and things i have grown to see and learn from.

Before i proceed with listing out the relationship red flags i would like to point out that there is no perfect relationship and there is always room for growth.

However there are some really important things that should never be taken likely..

Most importantly trust your inner voice, you know when something isn’t right

There is no need wasting time and energy in a toxic relationship.

1) when you always have to Disobey God in order to please them

It is very important that you are in a relationship with someone whom you are equally yoked with and on the same page concerning certain principles which you hold Dear.

If for example you have decided to honor God and your body by abstaining from premarital sex, you have no business going into a relationship with someone who believes in premarital sex.

Once you are in a relationship with them, there will always be a need to please them or make them happy even if it means having to compromise.

There are also individuals who earlier on in the relationship tell you they are willing to respect your decisions but as you go deeper into the relationship they begin to pressurize you… Change isn’t something that happens overnight so be cautious of these individuals.

pray, seek Gods face and be wise 

2) They never keep to their word

ughhh don’t you just hate lies?

For any boy, girl, man or woman reading this, please stop making empty promises.. let your yes be yes and your no be no.

lies breeds distrust and what is the essence of being in a relationship with someone who you don’t trust?

If you are a liar i have nothing to do with you because that is my emotions you are playing with. Tell them to stay away.

3) Everything has to  always be about them.

relationship red flag

yes selfish and self absorbed people definitely fall under the category of  relationship red flags.

Here is how to identify them , their most used words are I, ME, MYSELF…

They really do not give a shit about your feelings, they come first in everything and are never willing to compromise.

If they eventually compromise they would keep reminding you about it till thy kingdom come.

My friend run away from this ones.

4)They always remind you of the good they did for you.

you hear things like

  • if not for me you wouldn’t be here today.
  • you are indebted to me.
  • without me you are nothing.
  • i made you.

Emotional blackmailers i call them..

you find yourself having to constantly pay them back for what they have done and they would continue to rub their supposed good work on your face.

hey yes you reading this, you deserve better its time to leave.

5) inconsistency

sadly i used to be very inconsistent in one of my relationships, today i was in and the next moment i was out.

i knew what i wanted but i wasn’t sure if i wanted it with him and that made the relationship really hard.

you both deserve to be happy there is no middle ground, its either you are in or out… so decide.

6) They constantly compare you to other people
  • she shows her boyfriend love more than you show me love.
  • I wish you could act like him/her.
  • They are better than you.
  • He/She looks better than you.

when someone begins to compare you to others and makes you feel insecure, just walk away.

Remember Comparison is the thief of joy so choose joy and let them go.

7) They always want to be in control of who you hang around

This type of partners are painfully and annoyingly possessive..

  • They monitor your every move even when they know you can be trusted.
  • choosing who you hang around is like their first job.
  • serial stalker is their first name.
  • They call your friend like a million times to be sure you are with them.

Trust and insecurity issues are a major deal breaker in relationships because

  1. you have to constantly prove yourself to them which is very exhausting and
  2. you can never tell what to expect from them and what their reaction would be like.

i would recommend you talk to them and bring up the option of them seeking help. if they refuse help, you know what to do..

8) He/she is a Beater

Anyone who truly loves you would never raise their hands on you, regardless of the situation..

Do not be fooled by their “i love you, i just lost my temper” 

Sadly so many people have lost their lives because they were in abusive relationships and their partners kept on telling them they loved them until one day they were beaten to death.

Please Seek for help if you are in an abusive relationship, your life is worth more and God loves you.

what other relationship red flags do you know? please feel free to leave your comments.

Thank you for reading.

Have a great day ahead.





  1. True Doc. There are no perfect humans or relationships. However, certain issues, as those stated in this post, are warning signals in relationships. Thanks for the sweet counsel.

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